A blonde woman in a tan cardigan and white tank is smiling at a man with dark slick backed hair and a rust colored turtleneck. They are lighting a row of candles in the center of the dining table.

How To Spice Up A Relationship When It Gets Boring? We Got You!

November 20, 2025

Are you feeling the sparks fade? Sometimes it's hard to know how to spice up a relationship when it gets boring. But you know what--it happens to everyone every now and then. And it's easy to see how it can happen! Life might be making it hard to spend time together the way you did early in the relationship. Most of the time when we find ourselves in a busy season of work or family commitments, it makes it easy to resort to the same-old. For most of us, that means going out to eat. Delicious as that may be, it’s not exciting.) Sound familiar? Don’t despair. Every relationship has its ups and downs. But despite what social media may show you, feeling bored in a relationship is totally normal. In this guide, we’ll explore ways to spice up your relationship when it gets boring.

Feeling bored in your relationship? You're not alone.

It’s one thing to fall madly, deeply in love, which is something we wish for everyone! However, it’s another thing to expect that real life is going to play out exactly like a rom-com or your favorite trashy romance novel all day-every day, year after year. The Avett Brothers even wrote a song about this:

Now in the movies they make it look so perfect

And in the background they're always playing the right song

And in the ending there's always a resolution

But real life is more than just two hours long

This begs the question: is it normal to get bored in a relationship?

It may sound counterintuitive, but occasional boredom in relationships is a key indicator of a healthy relationship. In other words, yes, boredom can be a good thing from time to time. A drama-free partnership is safe, secure, and reliable. These words may give some of us the warm fuzzies while others see false red-flag warnings that boredom has reared its head. Psychologists maintain that occasional boredom indirectly helps people engage and find ways to beat the boredom. In other words, being bored contributes to creativity and looking for ways to not be bored.

Thankfully, you can learn how to spice up a relationship when it gets boring! If you’re looking for fun and easy ways to reconnect with your partner, then keep reading. (Or you can bookmark or Pin this page for later!).

The most fun activities for couples who want to spice up a relationship when it gets boring

Along with communication, doing new things together is the lifeblood of a thriving relationship.

Think back to the beginning of your relationship. This was a time of exploration. You did things together for the first time and everything felt new. Did you know that you can recreate that sense of newness no matter how long you’ve been a couple? If things have felt a bit dull lately, then it’s time to do something new together.

Here are some of our best ideas for couples who want to rekindle the romance and spice up the relationship when things get boring.

1. Plan a date

Did a new barcade, axe-throwing joint, or mini-golf place open in town? Go check it out. Does your partner have a favorite hiking trail you haven’t explored? Go together and bring a picnic lunch. Be a tourist in your own town or take a short day trip to someplace new. Go to the mall, get a coffee, and sit together and people watch! The idea is to do new things together, make new memories, and create new sparks.

A young man and woman are on a date at the arcade playing air hockey.

And the key to that is to do something that the two of you haven’t done together (or haven’t done for a while).

2. Learn a new language together

Sign up for Duolingo and challenge yourselves to complete the lessons. Learning a foreign language sparks creativity (always a plus in spicing things up–wink, wink!). Some people think it even makes you sexier, so why not give it a go? (Bonus: it’s literally good for your brain to learn a foreign language.)

A woman and a man are lying down on their bellies, arms propped up on pillows. They are both reading and the man, who is on the right, is pointing out something in his book.

3. Write a bucket list for two

If you really want to know how to spice up a relationship when it gets boring, then go out for drinks and make a bucket list of things you want to do together. Sometimes just the idea of doing something new can be exciting in and of itself. Plus, it’s always fun to daydream about the future.

A couple is looking down at a notebook they are both writing in; a tiered basket of fruit sits on the table.

4. How to spice up a relationship when it gets boring: volunteer

Help your relationship by helping others! It feels so good to give back to others. Serve the community–it literally boosts your happiness and has health benefits! The benefits of doing it as a couple just multiply.

Four people in a public park wearing blue t-shirts. Two are facing away from the camera. The other two, a couple, is smiling and posing with a tree they are about to plant. The blue shirts have the word "volunteer" on them.

5. Get on the same page–literally

Read the same book at the same time. Take turns choosing authors or genres, and make it your own ‘book club.’ This works double-time. First, you have dedicated time together. Next, the activity doesn’t get stale since you’re reading something new every few weeks.

A woman with long hair and a bald man sit on a Persian rug in their home library. They are in stocking feet.are snuggling and looking at books.

If reading isn’t really your thing but you’re both homebodies, think of new things you can do together at home:

plan a themed dinner
trye out new recipes together
have a wine and chocolate tasting at home
unwind with yoga together at the end of the day
try a new two-player video game together each week

A couple is preparing a meal using their gas stove and a red Dutch oven. The kitchen is completely white and red enamelware stands out against the lightness of the space.

6. See all the stars

The word stargazing in and of itself is romantic, isn’t it? There's just something about the night sky that inspires reflection. Escape the city lights, lay down a blanket, and enjoy the night sky together.

A couple is standing in a cornfield stargazing. The woman is on the left, holding the man's left arm, while he points his right hand up at the stars to show her something.

7. Play a game

There are more board games for two players out there than you’d imagine! Have fun and get competitive, but don’t take things too seriously. Kick up the heat by transforming an innocent board tame into a strip version of a game. It can make losing a little more fun (wink, wink!)

A couple is seated on the living room floor in front of an oak oval table. There are red wine glasses on the table and a game of Jenga at play.

8. Have a deep conversation

Communication is the key to everything, including romantic relationships. Don’t know where to start? Conversation cards make it easy! Expect to be surprised (in a good way). You can learn something new even after decades of marriage and togetherness. Even when you think you’ve learned everything you can know about a person, you’ll find that some of their thoughts and interests have changed over time.

A black couple is relaxing on the couch having a deep conversation.

If you’re on the quiet side, there’s nothing to fear. Research proves it! Studies show that deep conversations are less awkward and create a stronger connection. It’s especially true when you show that you’re listening.

How Deeply can help you spice up a relationship when it gets boring

A relationship becomes more intimate when couples engage in surpass surface-level topics. Couples who share meaningful discussions build trust, value each other's opinions and beliefs, and are eager to grow together.

It's time to move past how was your day, honey. If you’re stuck on how to initiate conversation or struggling to find new topics, Deeply can help immediately. We designed our conversation cards to bring you into deeper conversations. With this tool at your fingertips, you can get to know your partner on a whole new level. This is the one time you’ll want to keep your phone on the table when you’re talking with your partner.

Get our digital conversation cards and start chatting! (It’s seriously that easy.)

Ready to reignite the spark? Buy Deeply conversation cards today.

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